Wrecked

I loved Kenya and I want to go back some day. Cambodia affected me in a much different way. The country reached down in my soul and stirred up a lot of questions and misgivings about America, or more specifically Atlanta. I just don’t want to be here. I don’t know where I want to be anymore. For so long I’ve talked about southern California. Maybe that’s where I’m supposed to be? What about Cambodia or even Singapore?

What I’m experiencing is normal. It happened when I returned from Kenya last summer. You come back to America and see the wealth, complacency, entitlement and the fast pace of life. You feel out of place and wonder if those around you realize how good they have it living here. You feel like you need to make big changes in your life. After a while you slip quietly into your old routines. You live by the clock and your calendar. Then you lose it, that feeling of grace and appreciation. Nobody wants to lose it but it happens.

Our Cambodia team leader John talked a lot about purpose leading up to the trip. He said, “Once you’ve tasted purpose it’s hard to go back to meaningless living,” or something like that. I’m experiencing that too. The past few days I’ve been fixing my laptop. It works. My phone is broken but I’ll fix it today. It seems so pointless. I love movies but I can’t justify sitting on my butt for 2 hours when I could be doing something else. Reading the news reinforces the soul-sucking purpose of the media.

Don’t mean to be a Debbie Downer. I know I’m painting with wide strokes and meandering a bit. This is where I am. I’m confused. The main thing keeping me in Atlanta is the house my brother and I have. It’s for sale. I’m not leaving until it’s sold. I want to be free and clear from any responsibilities here when/if I leave. The other things keeping me here are my friends and my extraordinary church.

I am reminded of the main point in Experiencing God, which is join God where He is already working. Is God working here in Atlanta? Absolutely. That doesn’t mean that my heart isn’t yearning for something new, for a new adventure. However, have I finished what God has planned for me in Atlanta? I don’t know. I guess no since this house is not sold.

Am I being a little hard on America? Maybe. Am I coming down from a mountain top experience? Most definitely. I’ve tasted purpose though. I worked with Cambodian orphans who taught me more about love and affection in 5 days than in my entire life. I will see them again. There is no doubt I want to return to Battambang and experience the love of Christ.

Psalm 40 (NPM Version)

I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry.
He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire...









He set my feet upon a rock and gave me a firm place to stand.

Party Like a Rock Star!!!

On Thursday, we finished laying the pavers, skimming the borders and sweeping the sand into the gaps. It was exhausting work, but we were treated very well. The kids are so amazing; they treat us like rock stars – clinging to us, carrying our bags for us, wiping our faces with cold towels, bringing us water, giving us massages, handing us our shoes…even putting them on our feet for us like worshiping servants. We’re celebrities here! Now I know what it feels like to be a rock star!

We had planned to give Rataa (orphanage director) one of our laptop computers with copies of all of our photos so the kids would have a permanent collection of all the photos we took…I mean they took! Thursday morning, he suggested we have a “picture party” that night with popcorn & soda and watch a slideshow of the previous week’s work. Unfortunately, none of our laptops had an HDMI output nor did we have an RCA adapter with us. So, John asked Rataa to drive us to the computer store to see if we could find one. When John mentioned this, Rataa said he'd also like to price a few computers while we were there - he mentioned three or four times to John that he need really needed one. When we told him we’d planned to leave him a laptop, he was so grateful; he said that he had been praying everyday for a computer.

Since, amazingly enough, we finished ahead of schedule, we headed back to the hotel around 3:00 to clean up. After grabbing a few supplies, we were back at the orphanage by 5:00 for dinner with Pastor Vek and his wife and the “picture party” afterwards.

For those of you who aren’t aware, Pastor Vek and his wife, Samoeun, worked for Campus Crusade for Christ prior to the revolution in 1975. They narrowly escaped death several times, either from starvation or from execution during the Khmer Rouge's bloody four year reign. He and Samoeun escaped to Thailand with a tiny group of other survivors in 1979. They emigrated to the U.S. and lived in Long Beach until 1991. He said he and Samoeun asked each other why they had survived when so many others had been killed; he said the only answer they could come up with was maybe God wasn't finished using them. When Cambodia “opened back up” to outsiders, he and Samoeun moved back to Cambodia as staff members of Campus Crusade for Christ. Around 2002, he left Campus Crusade and founded New Life Missions in Phnom Penh. Since then, they have expanded from one church to fourteen, started four orphanages (Battambang’s was the first) and purchased one radio station from which they broadcast 10 hours a day – 7 in Khmer & 3 in English, including messages from Charles and Andy Stanley.

After dinner, he thanked us for our help and support. He said that when he was a boy, he was the only Christian in his whole school. Everyone, including the teachers, used to make fun of him and call him “Jesus” as a derogatory name. Back then, there was no such thing as a Christian Cambodian - if you weren’t Buddhist, you weren’t considered Cambodian. He said that is slowly changing. He explained that one of the goals of New Life Mission is to have 5,000 people commit to sharing Christ’s message with someone new every week. They calculate that 5,000 x 52 = over a quarter of a million new Cambodian Christians a year.

All week, we had given the kids our cameras and let them take as many pictures as they wanted. So after a bit of ice cream & cookies, we set up the laptop to play a slideshow of all their photos on the widescreen TV. They got a huge kick out of the pictures they’d taken of themselves - we had almost 2,500 pictures!!! After about two hours, thankfully, Rataa said it was past their bedtime and the party came to an end; otherwise, we’d still be there looking at pictures.

When God Shows Up

The amount of work we've done in the past 4 days is astonishing. Walking on these paths that we helped build is beyond rewarding. The transformation that has happened in the last 4 days can only be described as God-sized.

Yesterday after lunch the heat and humidity, the physical labor and long days got to us. We had so much tile to lay and all of us were doubtful we could finish, yet we weren't saying that out loud. Still there was a palpable sense we all felt. As we finished lunch rain came pouring down. The temperature dropped 10, maybe 15 degrees. The rain galvanized the kids and our team and we got so much work done. This can only be described as God doing for us what we could not do ourselves.

We worked in the rain for hours. The kids were all shivering because they were cold from the rain. We were all so happy for a respite from the heat.

Our God is ever faithful. Why do we get surprised when He shows up? I guess it's our human nature? God showed up in Kenya when we had to dig half a mile of trenches. God showed up in Cambodia when the odds were against us. Our God is an awesome God!

Tomorrow we say goodbye to the kids and head to Siem Reap. Then we leave on Saturday. Saying I'm blessed to have been on this trip is an understatement. God had a lot to show and teach me and He wanted me to come to Cambodia to learn it. I think I'll be taking lessons away from this trip for some time to come.

God bless.
James

Evening Matinee

Scott was a member on last year’s Battambang construction trip and he made a movie from all of the photos from that trip and put in on a DVD. So, yesterday we brought a laptop and we all watched it. They were so excited to see pictures of their friends from last year’s team again and asked about many of them. Afterwards, we played a Veggie Tales Hero’s of the Bible DVD for them that we had brought. Unfortunately, ::Connections didn’t have a copy in Khmer, so we had to bring the English version. But as you can see from the last photo, cartoons are universal.

Scripture

The highlight of my day, since it was short, was the scriptures we put under the pathways. John asked us all yesterday to write a scripture to place under the walkway so that the children would be walking on the word of the Lord. So this morning we gathered all the kids and each of us read our scriptures and then Kia, one of the older girls, and one of the older boys read the scriptures in Khmer. Everyone clapped and then the little kids buried the papers under the gravel. It is just so neat to see the excitement on their faces. Scott pointed out Kia's Bible and how many versions were highlighted. A true testament of the amount of time they spend in God's word.

Food Poisoning

If you are ever in Cambodia avoid the vegetable enchilada at Riverside Balcony restaurant. I order the enchilada thinking it would be something different from the rice and whatever chicken dish I chose every night, but after a couple of bites I knew something wasn't right. Unfortunately Patrick decided he would taste it and he ate quite a bit of it. It turned out to pretty disastrous for us both. Right before lunch today at the orphanage we were both spent so John had Pastor and Mrs. Vek bring us back to the hotel.
I spent the afternoon being angry and sad. I wanted to be out there with the kids. I wanted to be helping my team work on the pathways. I have heard the team did an awesome job and completed most of the tiling so I can't wait to see their accomplishments tomorrow.